Several months ago I heard from a woman who was really excited about an article that I had written for Christianity Today. She gave a copy of it to all of her friends and family. She then offered to write a testimonial of how the article fit with what she had lived through in her […]
Tag: mark
Blow Up Doll Marriage – Indianapolis Marriage Counseling
A guy said something really funny but also very poignant in my Men’s Group this week. My description of his wife’s severe Codependency on their wedding day made him picture standing at the altar with a blow up doll. By both of their accounts she was a non-person, a chameleon, adoring, passive, inauthentic, too other […]
An Affair Does NOT Have to End Your Marriage
If your marriage has been affected by an affair please try to be open and take in the concepts that I will share. I will discuss the root causes of most affairs as well as the ingredients needed to not only salvage the marriage, but also to rebuild it into something better then it has […]
Welcome To Relationship Jazz – New Weekly Noblesville Daily Times Column
Jazz – according to the Encarta World Dictionary, the word can mean a lot of different things. All of them, I would contend, could be applied to the understanding of relationships. It can mean (1) “beautiful, sensual syncopated rhythms and spontaneous musical improvisations”. Relationally that would be the magical moments of connection, communication and raw […]
Victim Mentality – Jennifer Doerr, Intern
[one_fourth_last] Iam not your average therapist. Most of you can walk into a therapist’s office, tell them your story about how your boyfriend or girlfriend mistreats you, cheats on you, calls you names, puts you down, ignores you, works too much, or nags you, and the therapist will ultimately confirm your victim mentality, give you […]
Two Strangers And A Baby – Andy Holzman
In my work, I’m often dealing with the history of love. An individual’s history of love relationships are useful in predicting future behaviors and more importantly, identifying and changing destructive patterns. For instance, a client will tell me about her love life and certain patterns emerge. Patterns of intensity, closeness, romance, sex, abuse and abandonment […]
How to Make the Whole Therapy Thing Work for You – Andrew Holzman
As the therapist’s partner in the therapeutic act of recovery, it is also your responsibility to make the process both safe and fulfilling. Recovery is fueled by a strong determination to recover from pain: childhood pain, relationship pain, habitual bad choices pain, addiction pain, loneliness pain, and anxiety pain. Recovery work benefits from a safe […]
Are You an Over-giver? – Angela Capretti, LMHC
Balance can be very important to consider in romantic relationships as well as in most areas of life. I have worked with many individuals and couples who were experiencing distress resulting from dynamics they created that were lacking balance. Several of these cases involved “over-givers“. An example of an over-giver is someone who focuses too […]
Managing Abandonment Issues Through Recovery
Abandonment Issues are a consistent hypersensitivity to any and all perceived or actual distancing in a relationship. You can’t fix it. It is way too deeply embedded in the personalities of those who suffer from it. You can’t even manage it…unless as the significant other you first see it, understand it, name it and detach […]
Our False Selves Masquerade As The Real Deal
Who do want for people to think that you are? Halloween is coming up, what mask are you planning to wear? Would you be ashamed if everyone you know fully knew everything about you? Would there be some scandalous revelations? Personally, I sort of like for people to see me as intelligent, successful, in charge, […]